Good Grief

Saturday March 16th is quickly approaching. That will mark 1 month since my brother died. Honestly, I'm not sure why I'm writing this. I have found it to be therapeutic in the past to write so I guess I'm hoping for that now. I don't want people to think I'm sitting around feeling sorry for myself. This post is merely the journey of my thoughts and feelings over the last month.

Being far from family during this time is quite hard. I feel like I abandoned my parents at a time when we should really be together leaning on each other.  However, even if I was still in Spokane I wouldn't be able to grieve. You see, I realized after my last post that I have put on a hard shell/happy face for people when I'm struggling with things. After a family member read my last post she told me she didn't realize that my grandpa getting cancer hit me so hard. I realized it was because I didn't show it. How could I call up my mom or grandma and cry with them when they were struggling themselves? It just didn't feel right. So I cried to Josh, once, (over the phone as he was deployed) and didn't talk about it much after that. Not because I didn't care but because I didn't want to burden anyone with my feelings. I've become pretty good at that over the years.

The first 2 weeks after Jason died, I fell apart. Being in Spokane was very hard. I was emotionally drained, adjusting to a 9 hour time change, and planning and making decisions I never thought I would have to do at my age, let alone for my 34 yr old brother. I was able to push a lot of my feelings to the side as I tried to make clear headed decisions for my family who wasn't in a clear state of mind. Many times I felt silly being upset. When sitting in a room with parents who have lost their son, a wife who lost her husband and a son who lost his dad, I felt insignificant and not worthy of crying like they did. After all, I'm just a sister.

I had many, many breakdowns during my time in Washington. Most came quietly in the shower by myself and others came out in the open when I could not hold it in anymore. Even today, almost 1 month after his death, I find myself having many breakdowns. Just yesterday I was driving in my car and Nirvana came on the radio (yes Nirvana was on the radio in Germany!) and I bawled. I remembered, when we were younger, he would blast Nirvana in his bedroom while I "acted" like I hated them but really I didn't; I can probably sing every one of their songs! Some days I have a hard time walking by my bookcase which has a picture my sister-in-law, Kindra, gave me. It's the last picture my brother and I took together before I moved to Germany. She said there was 1 framed picture in their house and it was that one. She gave it to me, frame and all. Jason told her that he rarely got to see me and it was a good picture of us so he wanted it somewhere he would always see it. It was on top of their TV. I know that even though I was just a sister, I was very much loved by my brother. I hope he knows how much I loved him too.

I find myself consumed in thinking of Jason. I rarely talked to my brother on the phone and while I thought of him often, it was no where near how much I think of him now. I finally told Josh I knew something wasn't right, I didn't feel right. It took just a few clicks on the Hospice of Spokane website to see that my feelings were normal and in fact I'm grieving...phew what a relief! I have realized grieving doesn't come one-size-fits-all. Everyone has their own way to grieve and in their own time. I have also learned that the way you grieve can change with each situation. Grieving isn't new for me. I've grieved a few times in my life before but never like I am now. I'm still not sure what I'm supposed to do with all these crazy feelings but I will get there. I'm seeking out help and one day I will find my new normal.

In the meantime, I hope my family (especially Josh) and friends are patient with me. Most days I don't feel right or normal. I know I'm watching TV or talking with friends or playing with my girls but honestly I feel like I'm not there. My mind is somewhere else. Many days it takes all I have to put on a happy face when I bump into a neighbor. I'm trying to be normal and do normal things. Since being back in Germany I've continued with school, attended birthday parties for the kids and will continue going to church. Honestly, I'd rather just stay home and not talk to anyone; but I know how unhealthy that would be.

So when I'm not myself and acting strange, just know it's not you, it's me. I have some stuff to work through and get figured out before I can move on. Despite what many people think, I am NOT mad at God. Not even a tiny bit! I appreciate all my friends and family quoting bible verses and praying for me, it does give me strength. While I may not be relying on God as much as I should right now, I'm getting there....I might be slow as a snail but I'm getting there! I'm learning to be patient with my grieving, it will get better.


The last picture of Jason and I. Taken June 2012. 

2012 Where Did You Go?

We are 3 days into the New Year and I have done a lot of reflecting back on 2012. Originally I was going to blog about my reflections of last year but then thought a blog about how awesome Christmas time in Germany is would be better. Well, I changed my mind as I feel pushed to share my thoughts on 2012. Next week I will likely write about Christmas in Germany though, because it's pretty great.

Before talking about 2012, I feel it necessary to quickly look back on 2011. 2011 was a very hard year on many levels. Josh left on Mother's Day for his 7 deployment and was gone for 6 months. In the beginning of 2011 I started to feel confident in my faith and really liked how things were going in my Christian life. Well not too long after Josh left my Grandpa, extremely healthy never-smoked-in-his-life Grandpa, got lung cancer. Definitely hit the whole family hard. To see a man who never even got the flu be hit hard with something so serious as cancer was a hard thing to wrap our minds around. Just a few weeks after his diagnosis another blow to my faith happened. A family close to me, very suddenly lost their baby after a very healthy, full term pregnancy-something you only think happens in 3rd world countries where OB care is nonexistent. Needless to say my faith was rocked and God and I were not on good terms. 2011 proved to be the year that I questioned the good of God. I won't go into long stories about either situation as they are not my "stories" to tell but rather give a quick summary of a realization I had later on in 2011. During an Alpha class I was attending (I highly recommend anyone questioning the Christian faith to look into the Alpha course) a question was posed on how we know we believe in God. My answer came rather quickly.When those things happened to my Grandpa and to my friend I immediately started talking to God..not necessarily nice things either. But I realized that if I didn't believe in God, I would have never been mad at Him or hurt by Him. On Christmas I don't get mad at Santa when he doesn't bring me a present, because I know Santa isn't real. So if I didn't truly believe in God, I would have never been mad at him..you can't be mad at someone you don't believe in. After realizing that I knew I was going to have a relationship with God again, it was just going to take time. I had not given up on Him and I wasn't going to. So 2012 was my year of working on my relationship and trust in God.

2 major things and many minor things happened to me in 2012. I will touch on the 2 major things as they are both acts from God and I feel compelled to share them.

As some of you know Joslyn had suffered for almost 2 1/2 yrs from something called Encopresis. I will try my best to save the gory details of it but still need to explain it a bit. Encopresis is basically chronic constipation that results in soiling of the pants in kids that are potty trained. When Joslyn was 4 she had been potty trained for over 2 years but out of the blue had soiling in her pants. This continued for many years getting extremely bad towards the end of 2011 and beginning of 2012. Treatment for Encopresis went from occasional colon cleanses to doing them 2-4 times a month! These treatments are something adults would cringe at and our 4,5,6 and almost 7 year old was doing them almost every weekend and missing out on so much of her childhood as she was confined to a bathroom for days. We were seeing her doctor a couple times a month and she even had to be referred to a Psychologist because of the long term damage Encopresis can have on children emotionally. Thankfully God gave us the most understanding tough-cookie of a daughter and the Psychologist was not concerned that she was affected emotionally by this! Physically though, Joslyn went from being one of the tallest kids in pre-k to slowly growing over the next couple years. Although she was healthy looking we just knew she wasn't growing at the rate she was before. We were getting hand me downs from friends whose kids were younger then her!

In February 2012 I was chatting with my good friend, Ari-Amber. I was expressing my frustrations with failed treatments for Joslyn and how it was getting worse and worse. Ari mentioned having our intercessory prayer team at church pray over Joslyn. Immediately I said no. I have trust in doctors and the medical field...we didn't need prayers, we needed modern day medicine (I'm totally kicking myself for ever thinking that!!). I really didn't see how going into a room, praying over Joslyn and bawling my eyes out would help her. Ari being the amazing person she is, never told me how stupid I sounded and just said if I changed my mind she would be happy to go into the room with us. I told Josh Ari's suggestion later that night and he thought it was a good idea. The next day was Sunday and I was outnumbered, so into the room we went with Ari, Josh, Joslyn and myself. 2 people Josh and I knew and trusted, Mike and Tonia Webb, anointed Joslyn with oil and prayed over here. I actually don't know what they said because I was praying so hard in my head for God to heal her and make her better. Later Tonia had told me that during their prayer she kept feeling/hearing "wheat".

Just 3 days later our prayers were answered (now God doesn't always work that fast but He did this time). It was Wednesday evening, Joslyn's GI doctor called and said we needed to see him first thing in the morning to go over test results that were taken a week before. Nope, not waiting till the morning...tell me now!!! So he told us she has celiac disease-makes sense why Tonia kept feeling/hearing "wheat". Most of you know all about this thanks to my endless facebook posts or from hearing about it first hand from me so I won't go into detail about it. There were other appointments we had to do before having her go gluten free (GF). In April 2012 we were given the OK to start the GF diet and since then she has not had a single problem with Encopresis (celiac disease caused the Encopresis). Just weeks after going GF she sprouted up in length and gained weight...she is continuing to grow rapidly but is very healthy.

I believe with all my heart this was God's work in her diagnosis. I know some people believe that the blood test was already taken and her results would have been positive for celiac regardless of praying over her. I completely disagree and say God did it. Statistically her test should have been negative. Most celiacs are diagnosed after 7-11 yrs of suffering (not 2 1/2 yrs) and are diagnosed much later in life (not at age 7). So she had everything stacked against her and yet her test came back positive. For that I give thanks to my Lord and my only regret is that we didn't go into that room and pray sooner. God is more powerful then any smarty-pants doctor or fancy medicine!

My last highlight of 2012 was our move to Germany! When we got orders to Germany (OK we actually got orders to Muscat, Oman first, then it was Germany, then it was Oman again and finally Josh picked Germany!) I was excited and nervous. I don't like change and I'm not a traveler and have never had any desire to see anything except Graceland!! So I knew the only way I could make it in Germany for 3 yrs was to pray A LOT to God. I prayed for acceptance in the move with open arms and an open heart. I also prayed and continue to pray that He help my family with me being so far away.

I can't tell you how many friends and family members have said to me, "Wow, Alethea, I can't believe you are doing so well over there. I can't believe you look so happy in pictures and sound so happy on the phone. I can't believe you are doing so much and seeing so much in Europe. This is NOT the Alethea I know." And those statements are correct! I'm not the same person because I asked God to help change me. I knew I couldn't survive living in Germany without help from God. I put my trust and faith in Him for this move and He has come through! I still struggle being away from family and friends but I also have a freeing feeling that I'm alright here, this is where I am meant to be right now in my life.

If you have actually read this whole thing...thank you! I also hope that if you are one of my friends and family that struggle with your faith, that you can take a look at how much I have changed and I hope that you will see that anything is possible when you give yourself up to God. I am still a work in progress and always will be. But I love that I have my Heavenly Father always on side and always quick to forgive when I do fail. I have found that having a church family surrounded by Christians is what helps me. There is something so wonderful about having friends that are always there to listen, not judge and pray for you when you feel knocked down. A big thank you to my girls back home who have been called upon so many times this last year for prayers, guidance and support. Jill, Ari, Lindsey, Brandi, Cathy, Jen and Nikke...I can't tell you how much you have helped me and you will always be a huge part of my 2012 :) Love you ladies!

Where's My Press 2 for English?

I can't believe I'm finding time to blog again! It's been quite a few weeks since my last one and I have been meaning to write but there was always something else that kept coming up. After Josh and I went to dinner last night and were greeted by our waiter in English, I just knew I needed to find time to write this.

Living here in Germany has been quite an eye opening experience for me. I have never felt unwanted walking into a restaurant or store or been given looks like I have got here. Yes some days I just want to scream to the locals, "I'm a good person, I mean no harm! I just want to eat a darn schnitzel...now stop staring at me and please help me translate this menu!!!!!" But instead I just ignore them (unless I'm feeling very ornery then I give them a HUGE American smile for no reason...I know real childish but I feel good for 1.5 seconds). After many experiences of not feeling welcome and just feeling awkward in general being in a country I don't understand, I had some reflection to do. Well guess what...I'm no better then the Germans that make me feel uncomfortable, no better then the ones who glare at me and no better then the ones who are secretly telling me to leave their country. Yep, I have done that too, in the US.

Now I'm not proud of that realization and it really makes me sad to think I have been so judgmental to strangers. I will admit, not proudly, that I have been annoyed many times that we have to sit through multiple language options when calling the phone company or self conscious and mad when a group of people are around me talking in another language or annoyed when the person in front of me clearly doesn't speak English and is trying to ask a question to a person who clearly doesn't speak their language...yes I have thought in my head, "If you are going to live in this country you should know the language." I know people have their own viewpoints on this subject and I'm not going to bash anyone's thoughts but I'm just going to explain how my view has changed on this. Who knows maybe it will give you a new perspective as well.

I used to be real quick to judge someone who wasn't from America. "Oh they must be here illegally" or "They have lived here for 50 years and still don't know English..grrr". But really I don't know a thing about them. Yes there are plenty of people living in the US illegally and plenty who have lived there for 50 years and still can't speak English but it's not everyone. There are plenty of "Alethea's" in America. Plenty of people legally living in the US that for whatever reason didn't learn English before they moved or they only know a little bit but once they are face to face with an American they freeze or maybe they are working really hard on learning English but they are struggling. Josh and I had a first hand experience the other night with how hard English is to learn. We had to explain to Joslyn how come 'said' and 'paid' are pronounced so differently. YIKES!!! I am so, so, so, so, so thankful for teachers...you guys are all awesome and WAY underpaid! Thank you teachers for all you do!

OK so back to my thoughts. We love living in Germany, I mean REALLY love living in Germany but it's tough when you don't know the language or the culture. Granted I had a couple months before we moved that I could have learned German but I didn't. Why? Because I felt it was more important to hang out with my friends before moving. Lame excuse, I know. So now I sit in Germany struggling. I've come pretty far and can recognize some words, say some words but not even close to putting a full sentence together without sounding...well, American. We have been quite fortunate that many Germans speak English and are incredibly helpful when we ask for help. But we have a long way to go. I remember when living in Puyallup we had a really bad winter one year and there were people that got seriously hurt from putting their BBQ grills's inside their house and turning on the propane tanks to keep warm. So volunteers went door to door in those communities and handed out fliers in their language explaining how unsafe that was because they couldn't read the English warning labels/instructions. Oh boy do I understand that feeling! I get worried that there will be an announcement on the radio or a flyer in our mail that says to stay inside your house because if you step outside you will die and guess who will not be able to read it and will be the first to step outside and who will be the first one to die? Yes that is a far fetched scenario but you get my point. So I'm thankful that those volunteers handed out fliers to those families and saved lives! WAY TO GO USA!!!

We moved into our apartment on base about 6 weeks ago. We don't have many options for internet or phone here. One company would take weeks and weeks to come out, are expensive and have a bad reputation but everything is in English (your billing statement, instructions, etc). Our other option was a company that is cheaper, good rep and could be out to our place in 2 weeks but it's in German. Well I'm all about saving money and I have an electronically smart husband so we went with the cheap company. So 2 weeks later Josh started hooking up our DSL (yep that is as fast as it gets on our base!) and it took him forever because everything is set up in German! He had his laptop set up with google translate and was typing up the instructions on his laptop and waiting for the translation in English so he could set everything up for our desktop...it took 5 times as long...but it's cheaper! At one point Josh needed to call the company. He dialed, listened for a bit and hung up the phone and said he had no idea what the recording said. My immediate response was, "They didn't have a press 2 for English option?" Nope they sure didn't. It wasn't that big of a deal as he just had to drive to the actual store and talk with them in person (they are super nice and have English speaking employees) but it sure would have been easier to just have an English option :)

With all that blubbering I guess what I'm getting at is, don't judge someone just because they aren't American and speak English. When we go to a restaurant (like last night) that has a menu in English or we are greeted in English or can communicate in English we just want to hug them and thank the restaurant for making our day! *To my Stuttgart friends-Auld Rogue, an Irish Pub, on Hautpstrasse is amazing*  We can breathe a sigh of relief when we are handed an English menu or when the waiter or cook speaks English and we don't have to whip out our translator/translator cards to figure out if the sauce, meat, fries, etc are celiac friendly for Joslyn's safety. It's just a nice feeling to feel welcome.

So the next time you are around a group of people talking in a different language, don't assume they are talking about you or trying to annoy you on purpose. They are just excited and happy to be in company of people who understand them! When we visited the Hohenzollern Castle a couple months ago, we were standing in line to get tickets and a woman, her husband and kids looked at us and said, "We are American too." I wanted to cry, hug them and keep them in my pocket so I always had another American family with me :) So we all just stood around yakking away, laughing and just enjoying each others company while being surrounded by Germans who were clearly not enjoying our annoying American accents!

Or the next time you have to call a company and you get annoyed that there are other language options, just remember that at some point there will be a 31 year old mom, who is living in America because her husbands job moved them, who will want to cry when she hears the "press 2 for..." option. That little recording will make her day, it will make her feel closer to her real home and it will make her realize that America is a nice, welcoming country.

Please don't get me wrong, I do not feel like Germany needs to have English menus, recordings, etc. I do not expect Germany to cater to us Americans and I don't feel like I deserve it at all. In fact Germany has been a pretty easy transition as they do offer so many options for Americans and for the English speaking public. I just realized how much I love Germany for doing those little things yet while living in America those little things were annoyances. I just didn't understand before but now I do.

I've said it before and I will say it again. I know God is working on me here. He is bringing my weaknesses to the surface so I can work on them and ultimately be a better reflection of Him. I don't know what His plan is for me for the next 3 years or what is in store for me back in the states but I do know that I will leave Germany with a much different, much more open mind then I had before.

Things That Make You Go Hmm: Germany Edition

This will be a quick post about things that have made me go hmm. I'm sure by the time I leave in 3+ years none of this will be weird for me.

• Walking into a department store I see a guy undress to his bikini speedo undies and he tries on a pair of shorts. In the states this same guy would have been arrested for undressing near children or something crazy like that. 
•  We have yet to see a truck here (besides the ones those crazy American's bring with them). That includes out on the farm. Josh pointed out that the farmers were using vehicles similar to a Geo Tracker. Maybe one day the Germans will realize they could get a lot more accomplished with a pickup truck. 
• While shoe shopping for Joslyn I noticed it is very hard to find shoes with laces. Joslyn is in a size 13 shoe and they all had velcro. I checked bigger youth sizes as well...but still velcro was on size 1,2,3 and so on on youth sizes. I guess my question is, when do Germans teach their kids to tie shoelaces?? I saw a size 3 youth Nike running shoe with velcro!!  
• At a nice restaurant the girls shared a piece of minced meat and white rice...which came with a packet of ketchup. Josh and I got "red rice"...rice with tomato paste in it. 
• After dinner was finished and the bill was paid the girls got suckers and Josh and I got a shot of something (Schnapp of some kind). Nothing like a shot before you get in your car! Funny seen how Germany  has strict laws on drinking and driving..hmmm. 
• Sex shops are normal here. So normal there was one in the Frankfurt Airport. They are not discreet behind blacked out windows or anything either. Their merchandise is out in the window display for all to see.
• Driving on the autobahn and looking out into the beautiful scenery we also got a eyeful of nakedness.  The Germans are fine and comfortable with nudity. They will be nude at beaches, water parks, etc. In many places the men and women even share changing rooms. They let it all hang out, no shame here! 

I will say that I love that the German's are not body conscious like we are. They don't sexualize body parts like we do in the states. I really think we could learn a lot from them and we would have less plastic surgery, less body image issues and much higher self esteem if we just accepted our bodies for what God gave us.

That's it for now but I'm sure this list will continue to grow. 

It's Been a Month

We moved to Germany a month ago. I feel like my eyes have been opened wide. Besides sharing our adventures with family and friends another goal of doing this blog was to look back months and years from now to see how far we have come. I thought 1 month into living here, would be a good time to reflect back on the craziness, strangeness and pure beauty of what I have noticed since being here.

I will start with our experiences on this base then move onto Germany itself:

I thought being on base here would be just like any other base in the US. It is in many ways. Signs are in English, you can find almost all your american food and household goods here (Lysol, Pantene, Kraft, Dove, General Mills, etc), parking spaces are bigger and parking lots are filled with SUVs and minivans and most of the people are American. Sounds like an easy transition, right? Now let's look at some of the differences we have to deal with. First we have certain items that are rationed. Want to buy coffee, cigarettes, alcohol? OK but you must hand the cashier your ration card and it shows how much you have purchased that month. I'm not sure if they allow a lot or not because those are items we don't buy (well alcohol but that's on a rare occasion). I'm not too worried about ever going over my allowed amount of any of those. Another thing rationed, gas. You have to register you vehicle and you are given a gas allowance to use in a month depending on your specific car. So our little, tiny clown car is allowed 400L a month. When our Ford Escape arrives we will likely have a bigger allowance for that vehicle. There is no sharing your ration between cars, no roll overs of unused gas...you get what you get and don't throw a fit! Speaking of gas, it's crazy expensive here! We got gas off base this weekend and we filled up our clown car and it cost almost $60...that was only for 1/2 a tank! Now we are very fortunate because gas on base cost the same as is in the states...cheap. We are also allowed to go to a specific German gas station, Esso, and fill up at the cost of base prices. So we really didn't pay $60 (we would have had we not had our Esso card). Another tidbit on gas stations on and off base...no pay at the pump. We have to walk inside to pay...UGH!! Seriously, we stepped back to 1990 when we moved here! One last difference on base but this also applies off base, there are no pennies. Sunday Joslyn took her chore money to the BX and bought a pillow that cost $9.99. She gave the cashier 2 $5 bills. The cashier said, "Your total is $10" although the register clearly said, $9.99. So Joslyn got her receipt and no penny!

Now onto our experiences in the economy (off base):

When we first got here and went off base I remember the looks people gave us (remember my story about the dirty looks I got in the ER waiting room?). Well that happens everywhere! We all stare, just admit it, we all do it. Now when we get caught staring we immediately turn our head as if we weren't staring for the last 3 minutes. Nope, not here. They don't turn their heads when they get caught staring, it turns more into a stare down. A very awkward stare down. I've tried the nod of head, little smile towards them...nothing. They continue to stare. The stare is usually accompanied by a very serious, non emotion face. Not a glare, just a plain old stare. Actually my first experience of this stare was in the airport from Seattle to Frankfurt. There was a lady who was a few rows away from us in the waiting area. She stared and stared at me and the kids. The girls weren't behaving too bad so I just figured she was a mean old lady who didn't know how to smile or anything. That was until her husband and friends sat down next to her. Then all 4 of them were chatting away and she was laughing and smiling...then she looked at us...smile is gone and stare was back. That lady's stare will always be stuck in my head but really we get those stares all the time. I am just now starting to feel better about it and realize it's not because of anything I'm doing. I am going to get those stares during my whole time here and I can't take it personal. I have talked with other military wives here and they have said the same thing. You just have to realize that is their culture and something they do (not everyone does it but a good portion do) and I will just brush it off.

We may have had some experiences with grouchy, staring people but I can also say the locals are soooo nice. When we, ok Josh, struggles ordering us food it usually ends up with everyone laughing at us and them laughing at themselves for their poor English. We went off base to a T-Mobile store to buy our cell phones. The lady was so nice and spoke excellent English, as many Germans do. Something we have seen time and time again is how they apologize for their poor English when they are practically speaking fluently! We assure them that they are doing great and we apologize for knowing very, very,very little German. Everyone we have asked help from, ordered from, etc have been so nice and that makes up for the awkward stares we get from others!

Before we moved here I had read somewhere that it is mandatory in German schools to learn English. Now I really don't know that for sure but it makes sense because most people know some English. I joke that they have to learn English because how else would they understand the music that is played on the radio and stores. Yes, that's right American music is played. Get in your car and you can hear a range of R&B, country, 70's, 80's and pop all on the same station. Then a commercial or VJ comes on and it's all in German. I read on someone else's blog awhile ago about Germany-the 80's are just as good now as they were 25 years ago! You walk into a grocery store, mall or restaurant...English. Still not sure why that is but I have yet to hear any German music.

It stinks here. Really it does. It stinks. Like poo. Walking outside you want to take cover when you walk by a sewer cover...EEWWWW! Our hotel room stinks. The sewer smells come up from the drains (no mom vinegar and baking soda did not help), its just a smell that comes and go goes here. I say it's very similar to the Aroma of Tacoma (my Washingtonians understand that smell). When driving in the car the smell will come and go as we drive along. When we smell that smell now we just say, "Germany farted."

The driving here could take up another 4 blogs so I will make it short. It's easy, it's hard, it's complicated. I think I'm getting used to most of it but I'm sure there will be many things I will never understand...like their rules for right of way at unmarked intersections. If you want to check out the differences just look at this website which is used to help study for our German license. See how good you do :) http://usareurpracticetest.com/ Speed cameras are placed in random spots around corners, hiding by trees, etc. The autobahn is crazy. A lot of it has specific speeds (not that many people follow it) and then there are the stretches of no speed limit. That's scary. As soon as the no restriction sign is posted people floor it and are flying by so fast you often wonder if it really was a car that just passed by! To ease my dad's fears about his girls on the autobahn I will say our clown car can't go real fast so I think the most Josh has done is 130-140 KM (about 75-85 MPH) and that was to pass someone. We all giggled this weekend when Josh was passed by a Smart Car!! Oh and Smart Cars are HUGE here. I like to say replace all the Prius' in Seattle with Smart Cars and that is what Germany looks like :) Mercedes Benz and BMW are very common here too. In fact the 3 taxi rides we have had were all in newer Benz's. Not too shabby for a cab!

Now onto a favorite of ours and a very popular fast food place here. Doner Kebab.

Walking around Germany you are sure to find a big selection of these stores that have hanging meat from their ceilings. They shave the meat off with a knife and it is served various ways. You can have it in a pita, by itself, on pizza and it's usually served with a salad and french fries. It is so good. Not good for you I'm sure but good none the less. To help you understand how common these fast food joints are I will give some numbers. There are roughly 13,000 McDonald's restaurants in the US (we all know how easy it is to find a Mickey D's). I couldn't find a specific number as of 2012 but in 2010 there were over 15,000 Doner Kebab restaurants in Germany. Oh did I mention that Germany is roughly the same size as the state of Montana?! Needless to say we can always find a place to eat last minute here!

I think I will end this with the beauty I have witnessed. If you are my friend on facebook then you have already seen many of our pictures of this beautiful country. I'm still in awe of it. My breath gets taken away every time we leave base and drive. There is something I love so much about the looks of the villages surrounded by all the greenery, all of Gods beautiful work is shown. When we drive somewhere we typically get lost and our GPS takes on some old back road which is what we love. This weekend during one of our detours Josh said, "It's like they build the roads around the land." It's so true and so completely opposite of what we do in the states. I'm truly amazed at the beauty of this country. I can't wait until fall when the leaves turn colors and even frost will appear. I have a feeling it will still be breathtaking.

There are still so many more experiences and eye-opening culture shocks we have witnessed. Here is a link to another military wife's blog and she puts a list of culture differences that were collected from various sources. Being here only a month and I can say that I have witnessed and agree with almost every single one of the listed items. http://lifelessonsmilitarywife.com/?p=270

Lessons Learned

We have had 4 weekends in Germany so far. The first weekend Joslyn was sick so we stayed at the hotel. 2nd weekend Kyla was covered in hives and again stayed at the hotel. 3rd weekend was our first weekend to really explore. We decided to take it easy by just heading to a local mall, checking out a couple stores that sell gluten free items and then went to our first church service since moving here. So this last weekend came and we decided to really go out and explore...

Saturday-Josh volunteered with his co-workers to help park cars at the Volks March that was going on downtown Stuttgart with the German-American Womans Club. The girls and I stayed home for the morning. Josh came home in the afternoon and talked about how the Germans like to party! We decided to not go into Stuttgart  because of the chaos with the Volks March, a protest about something and there was also the Gay Pride Parade going on. So we picked a city southwest of Stuttgart called Reutlingen. The drive there was beautiful. We were surrounded by rolling hills of green, trees everywhere and beautiful views of little villages in the distance. Felt like we were on country roads but we were driving 120 KM...it's really not as fast as it sounds. 

Getting into Reutlingen was another adventure. Although we have a GPS the roads can be a bit confusing here and we tend to get lost at least once when going anywhere. Josh found a parking spot on a side street only to realize we didn't bring any Euro change for the parking meters...GRRR! He had some Euro bills and went to a store and got change. Lesson learned...always have some Euro change handy!

 Reutlingen was a great place. I believe we were in the downtown area so there were tons of shops. We of course hit up a gluten free store and stocked up once again. Then we wandered around and around. There were familiar stores like Foot Locker and H&M but mostly were German stores. We went into one store to buy umbrellas (funny how I never used one in Seattle but I need one here). It was a multi level store so we grabbed the umbrellas and went up the elevator to check out the next floor. We went to pay on that floor and were told we had to pay downstairs. Ok we actually don't know what was said because she said it in German but her hand motions of pointing us downstairs led us to believe we had to pay there. So back down the elevator we go. And might I add that the elevator was just big enough for us 4 with a compact stroller...very small and scary! Go to pay downstairs and are again told we can't pay...huh? This lady motioned us to the back of the store to another check out counter and we successfully paid there. We were at a store called K&L. When we left, we glanced at the store again and we think that they store is set up in halves. So if you pick items from the K side you pay at the K side, if you pick from the L side you pay at the L side. That was the only explanation we could come up with and even that didn't make sense. 

We spent the rest of the time walking up and down the streets. We saw an amazing church. St. Mary's church which was built from 1247-1343. Josh quickly pointed out that America wasn't discovered yet.

After grabbing some Gelato (something we tend to do often) we left.

We decided it was still early and we should go check out this Sushi/Mongolian Grill place that people raved about and seemed like it would be easy enough to make gluten free. Lesson learned-when googling addresses don't translate to English. Our GPS wouldn't find the restaurant because google translated the street name of Klein Konigstrasse to Little King Strasse (which didn't exist). We finally figured it out and we head off to downtown Stuttgart. After making a few wrong turns we somehow squeezed through a tiny alleyway and went into a parking garage. We can't read the signs so we ended up getting lost in the garage and we hit a couple dead ends too. In Germany the parking garages are TINY!! So having  to back up when hitting a dead end is not a quick 3 point turn, it's more like a 30 point turn! After our experience in that garage I'm so, so thankful we bought a tiny clown car to drive in the city. I think if we had our SUV we would still be searching for a parking spot to fit in! 

We make our way out of the garage and into garbage....literally. They had sweeper trucks and leaf blower people going up and down the roads cleaning up tons and tons of garbage. We clearly just missed a big celebration. After a couple glances around and noticing all the stores having rainbow flags and banners, we realized we just missed the Gay Parade party. I'm not going to lie, I was sort of sad because I have a good feeling it was one heck of a party! I will say, that everyone was very cheery after the parade and I don't recall getting too many funny looks from people! We finally found our way to the restaurant and we were asked what we wanted to drink. I said water. And here is the conversation we had with the waitress.  

Me: I'd like a water.

Josh: Flat water (the Germans drink fizzy water and not flat water)

Waitress: *confused expression* gas or no gas?

Josh: Ahhh, no gas (meaning flat). We will take 4 no gas waters.

Waitress: 4? *again very confused and she writes 4L on her paper and points to it*

Josh: Yes 

*waitress leaves and hollers over to us. She is holding a 4 liter (it's about the 1/2 the size of Kyla!) bottle*

Waitress: This what you want?

Josh: Yes *Josh is confused why we can't just get a cup of water but agrees to the big bottle*

Waitress: 10 Euro for this.

Josh: Oh no! Um. Small we want small. 

Waitress: Small water.

Me: Yes just 2 (water isn't free in Germany...it's practically cheaper to buy a beer then get water).
Got 2 cups of water and Josh got a coke..that was a whole other experience I think I blocked out of my memory! 

2 Lessons Learned-learn the metric system and bring in our own water (not sure if we are allowed to but I'm not sure I can handle paying for water)

Off to check out the mongolian grub. As many of you know my favorite place to eat in Spokane is HuHot. We love mongolian grills and they are usually very easy to make gluten free. Well the selection here was not so good. Poor Joslyn got chicken and carrots. It was chicken, some fish, and about 6 veggies to chose from :( Next came our sauces. There were 4 to choose from. They didn't have the actual sauce present. Just a card with the name of the sauce with a colored straw attached to it. You then pick the sauce you want by picking from a bin the color straw that corresponds to your desired sauce. 2 were easy enough to figure out, curry and fish. That left us with 2 that were unknown. We grabbed the straw for the first one and Josh asked the staff if it was spicy. After some confused looks they all agreed it was ok and not "spicy". We got our food and it was clear the sauce me and the girls got was pepper of some sort...it was spicy! Kyla took a bite and screamed. I could only handle a few bites and surprisingly Joslyn ate a good amount of it. Thankfully we had the rotating belt that was included with our dinner and we ate lots of fruit! 

That concludes our Saturday adventures.

Now onto Sunday:

We weren't too impressed with the church we attended the previous weekend so we head off base and go to check out a new church. It was great! Now, don't get me wrong it was not our church in Puyallup and no church ever will be. We are trying very hard not to compare everything to Celebration Center and we are keeping our hearts and minds open to new opportunities. Kyla went into her 3 yr old room and although she cried for a minute, she had a blast. Joslyn went to her room where she has her own church basically. They do separate worship music for the kids and they have their own service and such. She had so much fun and talked about it nonstop the rest of the day. Josh and I were very pleased with the church and we think we will continue to go there. There were many military families there and we chatted with quite a few of them. After service a very nice lady invited us and some others to a German restaurant for lunch. We jumped on it! We ran back to the hotel, made Joslyn a GF lunch and headed out to the Schwabengarten, a beer garden. We sat outside next to the playground/sandbox and the kids had a blast. We connected with a few different families and had so much fun chatting with them all. It was so nice to be in the company of so many nice, welcoming couples. The ladies and I chatted about Awanas, MOPS and VBS, I felt at home again :) I was very excited to finally eat some real German food. We got the special (mainly because it looked good and we could just point to the special sign to order!). It was so good. Pork with some sauce, a dumpling of some sort and of course kraut! 

After lunch we decided to take advantage of the nice day and we headed off to a local park, Killesberg Park. It's a huge park. From what we have been told there is a swimming pool, petting zoo, train ride and more. We walked and walked the park and didn't even get to see a petting zoo or pool!  Josh and the girls went up a huge thing in the sky. I have no idea what it was, all I know is it was swaying in the wind! 

I figured it would cost money but people were just walking up the stairs so the girls and Josh went for it. I stayed on the ground, of course, and then I started noticing everyone else putting money into this wall. I thought this wall was just the explanation of this structure but towards the bottom there was something written with Euro amounts next to it. Thankfully the girls and Josh made it down alive and I told Josh we have to pay. He tried to figure it out how much we were supposed to pay but he couldn't figure out the words either! So he just had Joslyn shove a bunch of money into the slots and we called it good! Who knows we either took advantage of the system or we over paid by a lot.

Lesson learned-look around first and see if you have to pay

and yet another lesson learned-we need a translator...big time!!

A Step Back in Time

When telling people we were moving to Germany I would get one of two responses. 1. You will love it there and 2. You will see how "new" the USA is. Number 1 was usually from military members who had lived in Germany at one point so I definitely felt comforted by that response. Number 2 was strange for me. If you really know me, you know I don't have a clue when it comes to sports, politics and history. I  never have and although I'm not proud of it, I admit those faults. I'm very fortunate to have married a man who is the complete opposite when it comes to those things and he helps in explaining things to me. I am the one who is up to date on other important stuff. Like which Kardashian is getting married or having a baby or which Real Housewife of OC is backstabbing the others (ok they all are) or how Rosie Pope would handle your pregnancy issue..yep I know the important stuff :) So to go back to number 2 and how new the USA is. Well I think old and I picture old buildings, roads, etc. I thought the USA was old because I know of a few roads in the South Hill area of Spokane that are still made of brick...now that's old! Well after living here just 3 weeks I have a whole different understanding of the number 2 response.

Just last week there were areas blocked off around the base we are at because they found a WWII era bomb! Seriously!! Now even I know WWII wasn't eons ago but it was a long time ago. When that bomb was found it made me think about the history that is surrounding me. I can see the history when going into Germany and even on base. So many roads are brick and bumpy or are "old fashioned" as Joslyn likes to call them. The buildings and houses are so much older then I had ever seen in the states (granted I never really went farther then WA!). There is greenery everywhere! I'm used to seeing condos, buildings, houses, shopping malls, etc smushed together and stacked on top of each other. I see the cute, authentic German houses with their laundry being hung outside to dry. It's amazing! So many villages have been "untouched" by the modern world and it really takes my breath away.

I think of the personal history from mine and Josh's family. Growing up my Grandma Betty talked often about Switzerland and her mom's life there. I listened to tapes of my Great Grandma yodeling and now I'm less then 4 hours away from that very place...how cool is that?! We are close to the beaches of Normandy which Josh's Grandpa walked! If I'm told correctly, I'm at the exact base that my Grandpa and cousin both were stationed at many years ago. Being here makes me want to learn more about the history. I want to soak in all I can in the limited time we are here. Even 5 years ago I would have had a much different feeling being here but I know God has worked in me over the past couple years and He has prepared me. He has prepared me to be strong enough to leave my family and friends, He has opened up my heart to accept a new lifestyle I am not use to and He has opened my eyes to see the world in a whole new way....and in the end this world is nothing compared to what He has in store for me :) I truly feel blessed that we were given this opportunity by the military and even though Josh wishes we could have been here years ago, I know that our timing here was planned out perfectly by someone much higher then the Air Force! I can't wait to see more of this country and the surrounding areas and to share it all with you.

P.S. the USA is sooo new :)